Back to My Roots: Rediscovering Myself While Settling Back Into My Hometown

Moving back to your hometown after years away can feel like stepping into a story you thought you’d outgrown. For me, the decision to return home was layered with hope, hesitation, and a lot of unanswered questions.

Growing up in rural America, I was surrounded by a tight-knit community where life was simple and safe but also rigid and traditional. Creativity was something you had to carve out for yourself, and independence—especially for women—wasn’t exactly celebrated. By the time I left, I felt like I’d been handed a script I didn’t want to follow: marriage, kids, and a life confined by convention. Like so many small-town kids, I longed for something more.

But after college, I found myself following that very script. I got married, pursued a career in education, and chased stability. Years later, though, I found myself divorced, childfree, and living in New York City—finally questioning everything I thought I knew about success and fulfillment.

For a while, I thought life had to exist in a big city. I threw myself into new experiences—running marathons, traveling, and embracing my independence. The constant motion of city life wasn’t sustainable, and finding myself meant going back to my roots.

Years later, I returned to southern Indiana, unsure how I’d fit into a place I had once worked so hard to leave. To my surprise, while I had changed, so had my hometown. I noticed small transformations that made it feel more welcoming.

When I was younger, there weren’t any cozy coffee shops, but now I can grab a seat at places like Parlor Donuts or the Bagel Bistro to catch up with a friend. While living in NYC, my only source of nature was Central Park, and although it was lovely, it couldn’t compare to the sprawling nature trails of southern Indiana, like Patoka Lake State Park.

At first, coming home felt like returning to a place I had long resisted. I worried it would feel stifling or that I’d be seen as someone who had “failed” at the city life I had worked so hard to build. But instead of focusing on what I left behind, I began to see my hometown as a blank canvas for the person I had become.

The small-town streets I once found limiting now feel grounding. The cornfields and forests that used to represent everything I wanted to escape are now spaces for reflection, creativity, and growth. My roots became the foundation I needed to grow something new.

Navigating a new chapter as a single, childfree woman in my hometown has taught me so much about blending independence with community. It’s meant finding spaces where I feel at home, whether it’s enjoying a quiet moment in a coffee shop or hiking trails I hadn’t explored before. It’s meant redefining what joy and purpose look like—embracing the quiet joys of solitude and building routines that nurture my passions.

Of course, there are moments when I miss the energy of New York City—the diversity, the constant activity, the sense that anything could happen at any moment. But I’ve come to realize that contentment isn’t about where you are; it’s about how you live.

For other single, childfree women considering a similar move, here’s what I’ve learned: Your life doesn’t have to fit a mold to belong. Small towns like mine may not have the hustle and bustle of big cities, but they offer something even more rewarding—a sense of connection, space to breathe, and the chance to create a life that truly reflects your values.

Moving home isn’t about settling—it’s about uncovering the opportunities that smaller communities can offer. It’s about bringing the fullness of your journey to a place where you can plant new roots and thrive.

Wherever you are on your journey, remember this: purpose isn’t tied to a zip code. It’s something you create, no matter where you are. Small towns aren’t just places to settle down—they’re places to grow, to contribute, and to rediscover what makes life worthwhile. For me, coming home wasn’t about going backward—it was about building forward, one chapter at a time.